Izzy Rivera
Staff Writer
irivera1@umassd.edu
Dove was sick and tired of sitting on her perch in Bianca’s shower, getting used every day without any ounce of love or affection being given in return. She was dented on one side of her bar, being dropped right on top of the drain, and she was appalled by the state she was in. She yearned to escape, be free, and be able to sing her heart out with another bar of soap, just like how Bianca seems to yodel every time she steps foot in this stupid bathroom. She sighed and sunk deeper into her perch, feeling the groves grip more into her soft surface as she dreamed of running free.
All of a sudden, the bathroom door slammed open, and a boy was in Bianca’s bathroom, covered in mud and sounding frustrated. Dove could hear Bianca apologizing profusely, it seems that she splashed a huge mud puddle on this man while driving by. He sighs with a smile on his face, saying it’s ok, and closes the door. He brought in with him all the normal showering things, they must have stopped at a Walgreens or something, and Dove shivers in shock as she sees an Axe bar of soap being taken out of it’s packaging. Dove’s little soap heart began to race at the thought of seeing another soap bar, none the less a man! The dirty guy steps in the shower, eyeing Dove, and turns her sideways to put his Axe bar next to her. Dove shuddered with a thrill to her, the Axe bar just smelt so good, she was getting butterflies.
“Why hello there, I’m Carlos, nice to meet you”
“I’m Dove” is all she can manage to stutter out.
The muddy guy turns on the shower and begins to wash himself off, using Carlos to get himself clean. When he is put back on Dove’s perch, both of them sink into the groves together. Dove is so shocked that her dreams could maybe come true, they are so close and within her grasp, she just needed to work up the nerve to ask Carlos to sing with her. The now clean guy steps out of the shower, towels himself off, and leaves to go back to Bianca. Dove was trying so hard to work up her courage, but then all of a sudden she heard this soft humming come from beside her. It was Carlos, and she began to hum a harmonie with him, and before they knew it, both of them were singing their opera together. The beautiful tones bouncing off the shower walls.It could be heard for miles their song, and Dove smiled knowing she had finally found what she had longed for all these endless days. They can sing until they have no voice left, they can share stories and make new ones together. No more listening to Bianca’s howls alone, no more singing with no heart to it, now she has Carlos, and that made her little soap heart smile.
(This article was created for The Torchure Week 2021, this article is purely a work of satire as it is the April Fools edition)