(Image via Rosanna Pansino & Connected Cannabis)
Staff Photographer: Katelyn Pereira
Email: kpereira18@umassd.edu
Rosanna Pansino, a well-known YouTuber popular for her baking channel Nerdy Nummies, has paid tribute to her late father in an unusual and intimate way.
Pansino granted her father, Michael Reardon’s unique dying wish on the first episode of her new podcast, Rodiculous: to have his ashes used to grow a cannabis plant, which she and her family afterward smoked in his honor.
After an extended battle with leukemia, Reardon, who Pansino’s channel viewers lovingly call “Papa Pizza,” passed away in 2019.
In the “Smoking My Dead Dad” podcast, Pansino talked about how her mother, in particular, was at first hesitant to comply with her father’s last wish, “She thought, this is kind of hippie–people are going to judge us.” However, as time passed, the family decided it was time to grant his wish.
Pansino and her family were shown growing the cannabis using soil containing Reardon’s ashes in the 54-minute podcast episode. Later in the show, she took her first hit of the marijuana, choking from a coughing fit before reflecting on the bittersweet experience. Her mother and sister honored Reardon’s memory in a way they thought would have made him proud by toasting him with a bottle of whiskey he had produced.
Pansino was not afraid to talk about the significant impact that her father’s passing had on her life, “Losing Dad… it was just different,” she said. “I thought over time the sadness would fade, but grief is always with me—it feels like it’s permanently attached to me.”
The episode also included an interview with grief expert David Kessler to give listeners insight into how people deal with the loss of loved ones. Pansino stressed that the podcast was a genuine examination of the various ways people cope with loss rather than just a publicity stunt.
Her father was a “Willie Nelson” type, she said–vibrant, rebellious, and not afraid to live life as he saw fit. She was influenced by his mindset of honoring life and advocating for oneself, as well as their mutual love of cigars. “My dad was a badass and quite a little rebel, and I will be following in his footsteps,” Pansino remarked.
The episode received a variety of opinions online, with some praising Pansino’s honesty about mourning and others questioning her unusual method of honoring her father. However, Pansino found the gesture to be very significant and personal. She laughed, “If Papa Pizza could see this… he would get a huge kick out of this,”
Not only did Pansino’s first podcast episode offer a heartfelt tribute to her father, but it also sparked more general discussions about grieving, nontraditional tributes, and how families pay respect to the legacies of their loved ones in ways that are especially meaningful to them.
Moving forward, Pansino stated that future Rodiculous episodes would be less dramatic but still sincere, allowing her to connect with her audience in meaningful ways.